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Singapore’s Education System and Exam Pressure: What Role Should Parents Play?
Do we need to push our kids to meet the education system's standards, or is there a healthier approach?
Michelle Lim
October 14, 2024
Hello MindFull Readers,
How did your parents support you during exam season back in your school days?
This week’s newsletter has a bit of an "Asian flavour," as I dive into exam periods and my personal experiences with Singapore’s education system.
September and October are peak exam months in Singapore, especially for kids in primary and secondary school. It’s a time that often feels like a whirlwind of stress, with the constant feeling of running out of time. My two 9-year-olds, for example, have eight exams each to prepare for during this period. Watching them, I found myself thinking back to my own school days, wondering how I navigated those times at their age. Here’s what I realised:
Despite the bullying I faced and the growing unhappiness at home, here are some of the things that stood out to me from my childhood education experience in The Netherlands:
Just one major exam: Until Group 8 (equivalent to Primary 6), when we took the big exam to determine the best-fit secondary school, there were no other significant exams. This was similar to Singapore’s PSLE.
No pressure: There was zero pressure from both teachers and parents to hit a certain standard. We were all encouraged to learn at our own pace, without the weight of unrealistic expectations.
Play to learn: Hands-on practice and learning through play were a huge part of our lessons. We often engaged in activities that made learning feel like an adventure.
Physical activity: PE lessons were diverse, offering a wide range of sports from gymnastics to ball games and stamina training. Physical education wasn't just a subject; it was an integral part of our school life.
Long lunch breaks: We had a full hour for lunch, giving us time to go home, connect with our families, and recharge mentally before returning to school.
Outdoor play breaks: Every morning, we had a 30-minute outdoor play break, regardless of the weather or season. It was a chance for us to release all that boundless energy and refocus for the rest of the school day.
Reflecting on these memories, it’s no wonder I often find myself conflicted about the current education system my kids are in. I find myself taking deep breaths and stepping back to clear my mind from the constant worry zone.
A recent parent-teacher meeting at my children’s school highlighted the top three groups putting pressure on students in Singapore:
Parents
Teachers
Peers
But is this a classic chicken-and-egg scenario? The way Singapore’s education system is designed—with its intense focus on academic achievement—often makes parents feel like they have no choice but to push their children to meet these high standards. In turn, this pressure seeps down to the kids, who begin to measure their worth against their grades.
Or…
Should we, as parents, be the ones to break the cycle? What if we chose not to put so much pressure on our kids to achieve academically, and instead, accepted their results as they are? Could we be okay with our children perhaps not being as "successful" as their peers, as long as they are happy and fulfilled?
If you’ve ever found yourself wrestling with these thoughts, know that you’re not alone. Many parents are struggling with these same questions every single day. And if you’re wondering how to handle it all, hang tight—because in next week’s newsletter, I’ll share how my husband and I approach this balancing act as a family in Singapore.
If this week’s topic felt a bit heavy and you’d like to share your own experiences or thoughts, you know where to find me. I’m always here to listen, ready to hold a space for your stories.
With warmth and mindfulness,
Michelle Lim | Reparenting Life Coach - I help you break the generational trauma cycle and support inner child healing.
P.S. If you'd like to set up a free, 30-minute, no obligation, Healing & Growth Call with me to explore whether I am the right Reparenting Life Coach for you please book a slot at this link https://calendly.com/michelle-lim-tmp/healing-and-growth-call
Michelle Lim | Mother of 3 | Multi-Coach | Founder of The MindFull Parent | Writer | Preschool Educator | Babywearing Specialist | Breastfeeding Mentor
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